Acceptance

There has been an ongoing war between my spirit and my mind, at an on and off basis, that is. At times, my mind simply could not accept the changes in my life. Perhaps it is because God has been pushing me rather fast, and my spiritual state has progressed more in almost 2 years than in the past 20 years! My mind knows that I have to demolish my old temple, but a certain part of me wants to hang on to my past lifestyle. The internal battle has made me very tired, and when I felt weak, very disheartened. There were times when I wanted to walk away from it all, times when I could not pray, and times when I simply do not want to have anything to do with the church at all. The path of fire I chose to walk is scorching my feet, and it's getting harder and harder to endure.

Then recently, I woke up and decided to simply accept it. Accept everything, the good and the bad, all the trials and tests God has thrown my way. And with acceptance, comes strength. Once I accepted that this is the path God wants me to walk, my infighting stopped. The moment it stopped, I began to see everything in a different light. I finally realised that all this time, I've been praying to God to give me strength, not knowing that the strength is within me all along. The key to the reservoir of strength is acceptance.

Full, wholehearted acceptance. All the trials become a lot easier to bear after that.